How to Achieve Success on YOUR Terms

Ep: 166

When we start along our path to success, what message does each piece of our career puzzle convey about us?

And most importantly, where does it lead us?

If you lack understanding about what’s necessary to create the success you desire or you’re unclear about what true success really would look like for you, then it’s time to stop what you’re doing and learn how to define success on your own terms.

Today, Blake shares powerful insights about how you can create change and find more fulfilling work. If you’re ready to create life on your terms and defy what’s normal, a career coach can help you create an extraordinary life that’s built around your definition of success.

In this episode, you’ll learn what many people fail to understand when embarking upon a career change and why they often don’t end up finding what they truly want. She shares the wisdom of Dr. Jeff Spencer and the key phrase that helped her understand how to deviate from the “norm.”

It’s time to rise up and get clear on what you want out of life and take empowered action to bring it to fruition.

 

What You’ll Learn:

  • What most people miss in their search for success (0:38)
  • Are you running a race you don’t want to be in? (1:57)
  • What you need to realize if you want to pursue change (3:48)
  • What it means to defy normal (5:16)
  • How most women are going through the motions of their lives (6:24)

 

Favorite Quotes:

  1. It isn’t a lack of desire to achieve; it’s a fundamental misunderstanding of what’s necessary to create the success you desire.
  2. Most of the conventional wisdom is wrong if you truly want to live a life of fulfillment, peace, joy, and impact. If you do what everyone else does, you’ll end up with the results that everyone else has.
  3. You don’t lead an extraordinary life by doing what everyone else does.
  4. It’s time to rise up and get clear on what we want out of life and then take empowered action to bring it to fruition. Things will only change when we do.

 

Additional Resources: 

Rather than hoping the grass will be greener, identify what the RIGHT next step is. 

We can help you do just that.

Get clarity on where you are on your journey to career fulfillment, where you’re headed, optional paths to get there, and the right next step to take.

Start your complimentary, Personalized Career Fulfillment Plan by going to www.thebridgetofulfillment.com/plan

Want free resources to set your job search up for success? You can get them by going to: https://thebridgetofulfillment.com/mistakes

Transcript

Blake Schofield 0:05 Hi, I’m Blake Schofield, founder and CEO of The Bridge to Fulfillment, mom to three, USA Today top 10 professional coach, and former corporate executive who got tired of sacrificing my life for a comfortable paycheck. My mission is to expand women’s perspectives and empower them to achieve greater impact at home and work without sacrifice. This is The Bridge to Fulfillment. The other day I was on Facebook and ran across a post that says something like this: “Everyone says they want to succeed, but few are willing to put in the time, energy and focus to achieve mastery.” And then I saw person after person commenting and I realized it isn’t just that people’s words don’t match their actions, nor that they aren’t willing to put in time and energy into their goals. What I’ve observed and personally learned many times, it isn’t a lack of desire to achieve. It’s a fundamental misunderstanding of what’s necessary to create the success they desire, and a lack of clarity about what true success really would look like if they defined it on their own terms and not someone else’s. As a result, they end up mired in to do list and chasing more, instead of creating the life they want. Why do I say that? Well, I used to be that person, believing the title promotion, or next big win would finally make me happy, chasing the material things, believing that with success. Working so hard to achieve and believing that success required sacrifice and hard work. I would see those people who were I don’t know, quote unquote, living life differently. And just think that they got lucky. I believed that in order to be successful, I needed to do the work and know all the answers. I didn’t want to be a burden. I wanted to prove to people that I deserved what I learned. In the words of one of my mentors, Nick, I was running a race I didn’t really want to be in only thing was I didn’t know it. I was going along with the crowd what I had been told by conventional wisdom was the way to success. And here’s what I know today, most of conventional wisdom is wrong if you truly want to live a life of fulfillment, peace, joy and impact. If you do what everyone else does, you’ll end up with the results that everyone else has. I’ve never considered myself average. In fact, the idea of being average honestly just goes against everything in terms of how I’m wired. Yet I was doing the things I thought high achievers did. And I was watching as every one of them was burned out exhausted, and led lives that were very much out of balance. And I began to question whether this life was worth it for me. Because I could only see sacrifices, sacrificing the income and respect I’d earned, sacrificing our lifestyle and vacations, or sacrificing challenging work so that I had better balance. I couldn’t see another path. And this is where I see so many women trapped exactly where I was wondering if something is wrong with them, maybe they’ll just never be fulfilled. Giving up on the idea that they could actually have it all. And believing that maybe this is just all there is. If you have the internal drive to do something meaningful with your life, but you just aren’t sure how to do that without sacrifice. I want you to know there’s a better way, a way of freedom, peace of mind, more presence and balance in your life. Clarity on who you really are and the value you bring the conviction and confidence to articulate what you want and need and go after it. But it starts with realizing that you don’t have all the answers that none of us do. It starts with seeing that what you’re doing is focusing on getting more instead of actually moving you closer to what you want. It starts with realizing that you don’t lead an extraordinary life by doing what everyone else does. This week, my coach Dr. Jeff and I both got on our weekly zoom call wearing the same phrase on our T shirts defy normal. Five years ago, that phrase would have confused me or made me nervous. I used to believe that I had to comply in order to be successful, that I couldn’t be fully me that I couldn’t ask for what I wanted without being quote unquote, blackballed or suffering consequences.

Blake Schofield 4:57 Now I know that it was me who was stifling my own voice I know and I have so much proof that you can speak up for yourself and be seen as even more valuable as a leader. And as a person. Today, I don’t know define normal, maybe as becoming my mantra. So let’s break it down the definition of defy to openly resist or refuse to obey. And the definition of normal, usual, typical or expected. I don’t know about you, but leading a life where I have to comply. And I’m typical, just is not what I want from my life. And I know there’s so many other women that feel the same way. You want to feel like your day to day life is impactful that you’re making a difference that you’re a role model to your children, that you’re energized and passionate and excited about your life, and your work and the things that you do. You know, I have no interest in leading an average life, I want to continue to expand the possibilities of my life, my family’s lives, and the women around me who are looking for more in their life. So if that resonates with you, it’s time. It’s time, ladies, it’s time to rise up and get clear on what we want out of life and then take empowered action to bring it to fruition. Because things will only change when we do. The average American today makes 53,000 a year, she works 47 hours a week, and 60% are unfulfilled in their career. I could go on and on and on. If you look at what average means, in America today, it’s actually honestly in many ways sad, because so many people are living beneath their potential. So many people are just going through the motions of their life. But it doesn’t have to be that way. So when I encourage you, with this very last statement for today, you can’t create an extraordinary life, if you are conforming to the average and what everyone else is doing. A big part of the work that I do is help women step up and level up in their lives, and in their careers to truly create what they want. And I want you to know that you have the power inside of that yourself. Sometimes what we need to understand is that what we’ve thought was the path maybe actually isn’t the most efficient way to get where we want to go. Maybe the barriers that we see in front of us truly, actually aren’t barriers, and there are ways around them. We just need a more holistic impartial view to be able to see how to create what it is that we truly want. I often say that every single problem has a solution. And if there’s a desire for more in your life, but you aren’t sure how to find it, or how to get to it, that is exactly where it’s a moment to stop and say, Who can help me who can help me see a way forward to create what it is that I truly want in my career and in my life. Because the reality is we only have one shot at this. Right? And I’m not willing to waste that shot being average. And if you’re listening to this podcast and you’re a frequent listener, I imagine that you aren’t willing to either. Thanks for joining me today. Rather than hope the grass will be greener, identify what the right next step is. We can help you do just that. Get clarity on where you are in your journey to career fulfillment, where you’re headed, optimal paths to get there, and the right next step to take. Start your complimentary personalized career fulfillment plan at www.thebridgetofulfillment.com/plan . Again, you can get your personalized career fulfillment plan at www.thebridgetofulfillment.com/plan . Thanks again for joining and have a great week ahead.