Why a Less Stressful Job isn’t the Answer

Ep: 146

Are you tired of not having the balance you want in your life?

Are you feeling stuck in a work environment that’s toxic?

Often when we feel this way, our first impulse is to change our environment. We start searching for new jobs and tell ourselves that things will get better. But it doesn’t take long until we recognize the same problems starting to return.

A “change of scenery” or taking a step back in your career is rarely the answer. These are just short-term solutions to bigger problems, and until you address the root cause, they will continue to follow you wherever you go, into whatever job you take.

Today, Blake explains why the changes you seek won’t be found in new jobs or title changes. You’ll hear why continuing to make career compromises is a never-ending cycle that won’t lead to permanent change, and she reveals the reasons why stress follows you into every new role. When exhaustion and dissatisfaction follow you, job after job, it’s a clear sign that you need a fresh perspective.

Real change starts with learning new habits, creating boundaries, and learning the tools that will ultimately help you do your job differently.

What You’ll Learn:

  • How coaches and mentors can help shed light on the possibilities that exist (2:06)
  • Blakes journey of discovery, from job changes to mentorship (2:43)
  • Why simply changing your job won’t change your situation (5:01)
  • The lie you have to stop telling yourself if you want better balance (7:47)


Favorite Quotes:

  1. It wasn’t until I started out on my own and ended up getting coaches that I became aware that I was sacrificing things that ultimately would never make me happy. I was trading one thing for another. —Blake
  2. You may think that it’s the stressful job or the toxic environment that is making you unhappy and creating that imbalance… But the reality is, that’s only part of the situation. The other part of the situation is actually you. —Blake


Additional Resources:

Rather than hoping the grass will be greener, identify what the RIGHT next step is.

We can help you do just that.

Get clarity on where you are on your journey to career fulfillment, where you’re headed, optional paths to get there, and the right next step to take.

Start your complimentary, Personalized Career Fulfillment Plan by going to www.thebridgetofulfillment.com/plan

Want free resources to set your job search up for success? You can get them by going to: https://thebridgetofulfillment.com/mistakes

Transcript

Blake Schofield 0:03 My name is Blake Schofield, founder and CEO of Connections Illuminated, mom to three, and former corporate executive who got tired of sacrificing my life for a comfortable paycheck. My mission is to change women’s perspectives about what is possible, empowering them with the tools to create greater impact at home and at work without sacrificing their health time family or income. This is The Bridge to Fulfillment.

Blake Schofield 0:30 Have you ever gotten to a point in your career where you’re just so tired of not having the balance you want or feeling stuck in an environment that’s toxic, that you start telling yourself, maybe I should just move to a less stressful job or take a step back in order to get better balance and be more happy in my life? If so, this message in this episode is for you. For those of you who have been listening a while you know a little bit about my personal journey that I spent 18 years in corporate retail, continuing to move jobs hoping that the next one would finally make me happy. And I went through ebbs and flows in my career feeling energized and excited. As I moved into new companies and new jobs within ultimately finding the honeymoon period would wear off. And I wouldn’t be back in the same place. Again. After going through the cycle for years and years and years and working for five different companies in 18 years, I got to a place in my career where I believed my only choice was to sacrifice my income. So that I could do more fulfilling work and lead what I would have called a quote unquote, more sane life. And at the time, I believed that I would be happy doing that, because I had gotten to a place where I tried everything else. And it didn’t work for me. It wasn’t until I started out on my own, ended up getting coaches that I became aware that I was sacrificing things that ultimately would never make me happy, I was trading one thing for another. And so if today you were telling yourself that maybe taking a step back, would give you what it is that you really want, I want to challenge you that you likely are making the very mistake I made. Now, as you heard that happened to me as I started my entrepreneurial journey until I ran into mentors that helped me realize it only did I not have to sacrifice my income, but I could actually make more money, I could actually be more successful and have better balance in my life. And that was a big aha for me. But I want to share with you the journey that I had before then because you’re likely thinking about exploring or maybe even the three years this yourself. You know, I spent the first portion of my career in human resources really realized that that wasn’t where I could see myself for the next 30 years and transferred into corporate merchandising went worked at Neiman Marcus for a couple years. I’ve enjoyed that, but saw that there wasn’t a lot of movement, people on the jobs are the same exact job for a really long time. And I struggled to see how I can really start a family and have the balance that I wanted. And then I moved to JC Penney, where I was for seven years, working honestly 60 to 70 hours a week the entire time. And I’ll never forget when the recruiter my friend Joel came knocking on my door to come to target obviously didn’t know him then but he ended up becoming a friend. And at the time, I thought wow, maybe there’s finally a company that I can have the balance I want and feel challenged and energized by my work. And as I went to Target, one of the things that to be honest, I kind of sacrificed was my job at JCPenney was far more, “challenging.” It was much more complex, there were a lot more details. And when I got to target at the time, target did not have as robust or as built out of an apparel division as what I was used to at JCPenney, which was a very apparel driven company. And so I found myself super excited and happy for better work life balance for more of a focus on leadership and development. But to be honest, I really wasn’t as intellectually stimulated or as challenged. And that was a sacrifice that I took on. And there were challenges that I actually felt in feeling that way. I found myself also in that same situation moving to my final corporate job where I felt that there was much more that I could be doing than what I was doing. And in each one of those situations, I would feel the positive of fixing the thing that it really been sort of the bleeding neck the thing that had been really driving me crazy, but there was this unsettled lingering of something else missing.

Blake Schofield 4:47 And that’s what happens when we compromise when we tell ourselves that lie that I’ll be happy when right that maybe just stepping away from this will make it better and here’s why I want you to Know that it doesn’t, if you are taking a step back or thinking about taking a step back in your career, because you’re exhausted and you don’t have balance and you want less stress, what I want you to understand is you in the short term will fix that problem, you potentially will have less stress, but guess what, you’re going to go into that next job, and you’re still going to be the same hard worker, you’re still going to have a hard time shutting off work, you’re still going to commit more than you need to. Because you haven’t learned the habits, the boundaries or the tools to do things differently. And so you think that it’s the stressful job or the toxic environment that is making you unhappy and creating that imbalance. But the reality is, that’s only part of the situation. The other part of the situation is actually you. And so what happens is, you end up finding yourself back in some of those similar patterns, but you’re not challenged anymore, the work is not nearly as interesting, you’re not being paid your value and worth, but you’re still working really hard. And then over time, you begin to feel bitter and angry, that you’re still contributing so much. And yet, you’re really not passionate and energized and feel valued in the way that you want to. And so often I talk to women that say, Well, I think I think this is the right thing for me. And then when I really ask them this question, which is like, Do you really not have a drive anymore? Do you really like is it not important to you to continue to progress and grow in your career? Like is your number one and like, entire priority? Just balance? And if so that’s totally okay. Totally. Okay. Right, you have to do, you have to find success in your terms. But the women I work with, they’ve been driven their whole careers, they’ve been successful, they’ve worked really hard for what they want, and the drive doesn’t go away. What sitting there, though, is a misalignment of their life with their values. It’s missing the skills and tools necessary to lead a challenging and fulfilling and passionate career without sacrificing their health, their time, their balance. And those things don’t get fixed by going to another job, they will follow you, I promise you, they follow me to every job. And then when I became an entrepreneur, and there was no one telling me what to do, and I had complete control, they followed me there. And it was the moment when I realized, wow, some of this actually isn’t the company’s the bosses that whatever. Some of it actually is me. And so I’m going to share this with you because when I challenged women on, we regret that the real answer, you know, when it’s like, Well, can I really have everything can really have the challenging job and less stress and better balance and the ability to shut off work, and be passionate about what I do. The answer that question is yes. So if any part of you is thinking, I have to sacrifice to get there, I want to tell you to stop, please stop, please stop telling yourself that lie. If you don’t know how to do it, right. That’s why experts like me are here to be able to help you understand that you don’t have to sacrifice or compromise. Because what I do know is if you do compromise, nine to 12 months later, you’re gonna be back in a cycle again, you’re going to be unhappy again, and you’re going to have wasted so much time and energy trying to fix the problem that you’ve never really fixed. Because you didn’t get at the root cause. I want you to know, there’s so much more possibility for your life, that you can get back that passion and energy that you have for your work, that you can truly be able to do impactful work without having to sacrifice your health, your family, your time, your balance all the things that matter to you. But it starts with not hoping the next job will be better, right? But really getting crystal clear on exactly what that right next step is for you. And so I want to encourage you today, that there’s so much more possibility for your life, that that thing that you’re doubting isn’t even possible, I can almost guarantee that it is. And if you don’t know how to find that on your own, and you’re really truly ready to move into a more fulfilling career in life. Please reach out. We’d love to talk to you and see how we can help you understand and identify what the right next steps are for you. Until next time, have a great week ahead.

Blake Schofield 9:28 Thanks for joining me today. Rather than hope the grass will be greener, identify what the right next step is. We can help you do just that. Get clarity on where you are in your journey to career fulfillment, where you’re headed, optimal paths to get there, and the right next step to take. Start your complimentary personalized career fulfillment plan at www.thebridgetofulfillment.com/plan Again, you can get your personalized career fulfillment plan at www.thebridgetofulfillment.com/plan Thanks again for joining, and have a great week ahead.